XXIVkay, what does it mean?

For those who are entering my website and asking themselves… What the fuck does XXIVkay have to do with anything ?! Well, I don’t blame you for having that reaction because I do have a bad habit of expecting others to just know. A narcissistic behavior trait? who knows. But XXIV is the Roman numeral number for 24. 24 is a very lucky number to me. It’s my birthday, it’s the date my parents met. A number that frequently pops up as a good sign in my life. Wasn’t even supposed to be born to keep it honest with you, a month early and a miracle Baby from several tries before me. There was doubt even when I wasn’t even born yet, being in someone’s stomach fighting for 6 months and still everyone especially the birth giver doubting the success of your life.. my life. Is the same thing I struggle with now, but to get back to what I was saying. I fought and unexpectedly came about on January 24th. Always saw the number, it became a comfort to me as a child. I would tell myself, “ look, it’s 24, ill be okay “, smile and walk away. Why you may ask? Is a little kid telling themselves that? When you’re alone and have no friends and your parents are too busy being toxic, full-on fighting cheating drugs, moving around, going through strangers for comfort. Sometimes people develop good signs and symbols to really help themselves to continue getting through their troubled life. I see it often with people like me with no siblings, or those who have dealt with some seriously messed up home issues like me. Especially a mentally damaging one, constantly invalidating my feelings. You would think as an adult it changed, I grew out of that lucky number thing. No, it’s tattooed to my body now, so how dedicated do you think I am to This? Very.

One day I want to make XXIVkay into something bigger. To help those who are going through mental troubles. Depression, anxiety, feeling alone, different from the world? I’m a part of the Black sheep family, the outcast, the misfit. I want to invest and figure out methods and invest my extra time in mental awareness. It’s something that’s not focused on, And for someone whose feelings are constantly being invalidated by family, boyfriends, “best friends”, it really hurts. Yeah, we don’t need people in this world but not really, having peers around can boost your mood your energy.. so many things I can continue to share. But soon more blogs will come.